Breakups are hard for most of us, especially if you feel like you gave it your all. You were completely invested in this one person and thought that things would work out. You couldn’t imagine a life without them and now that life is finally here. So what should we do? I have one answer which is the only possible answer: recreate ourselves.
We must rediscover who we were before them and also figure out who we want to be after them. What lessons did you learn from that relationship? How do you plan on applying them to who you are now? Don’t let a person break you and leave you feeling empty; you have too much life left to live.
My mentor (who is like my second mother) told me that no one should complete you; they should only add to the person you already are. If you feel like you’re missing something, you shouldn’t search for it in someone else. You’ll find that missing piece somewhere within yourself. This makes sense. Only you will know exactly what you want all of the time. You cannot rely on others to make you happy because you’ll always end up feeling shortchanged.
Go through your grieving period. Take your time but don’t take too long. Rushing into a new relationship won’t solve anything. You need to know who you are so you can figure out what you want.
Try something new. If there’s anything you’ve always wanted to try, go for it. Don’t make excuses as to why you shouldn’t. You’re holding yourself back. Experiencing something on your own is wayyyyyyy more fulfilling than watching someone else do it.
Date. You don’t have to be in a serious relationship. Most people just want to have fun anyway. Not saying that you have to be out here sleeping around. Just meet new people. Give chances. Take risks! Live and learn, my dear, live and learn.
You don’t have to get a super short haircut or wear something awful but try spicing up your wardrobe a bit. Wear something you don’t normally wear and exude confidence. Suggestion: Don’t just wear it around the house, actually go outside and let people see you.
Take yourself on a date. Treat yourself how you want to be treated. I can honestly say that I’ve never been to a restaurant, Movie Theater, or any place that you’d expect couples to be, by myself. It will probably seem awkward at first but who cares what people think. My mom does it often and she told me that people are actually nicer to her (maybe because they feel sorry for her). She said it’s an exhilarating experience and everyone should try it at least once.
That ex-lover of yours never completed you. He only made you content. Remember that you should complete yourself or else you’ll always be looking for someone to fill that void within you. It’s ok to confide in someone else or confide in your journal. Whatever you do, you need to get it out of your system and start working on you. If you’re reading this now I’m sending you love, light, peace, and blessings!
I hope that your journey into the New Year is as wonderful as the year itself!